Cogs can think.

Today, I went to the municipality building to get a new passport (my previous one had expired). I get in there, and the woman behind the counter said they needed my expired passport to complete the request for a new one. I went home, got my old passport, and got back. Of course, suddenly, there now was a huge queue.

When it was my turn, I was perplexed. The woman takes my old password, takes a quarter of a second peep, and then asks, you want it back or do you want my to shred it. I replied, “oh, shred the thing”, but while I was saying it, it dawned on me: why in the name of all that is female beauty did they need that old passprt for? That peep?

Slightly annoyed, I remained calm and nice and fluffy as I always am. Then they did another government official pointless trick: their computer said I still owned an identity card (a sort of mini-passprt with which you can travel to EU countries only), which had expired a year ago. They wanted it.

I was getting pissed off. Woman, I don’t have it anymore, I threw it away after I got my passport, 6 or 7 years ago. Why didn’t you morons tell em then I needed to give it back? “Oh no, you can have them both, side-by-side, no problem?” “Then what is the problem now?” “It is expired. You either need to find that old ID card, or go to the police station, report it missing, and then get back here with that report so you can pick up your new passport.”

I was so perplexed, I could not think straight. I just accepted this nonsense. But when I stepped in my car, only then did I fully realise the utter nonsense I just heard. How fcuking hard is it, you stupid fat blonde ugly cunt behind that fcuking service desk, who lives off MY damn hard-earned tax money, to press that fcuking shiny ‘del’ button on you ergonomic Microsoft keyboard, so you, fat, ugly blonde whore can get me my damn passport?

Goddamnit I so hate ambtenaren.