Jerking off is not the same as having sex
December 26, 2006Seriously.
I just saw the most ridiculous thing in the history of mankind. Apparently, there is now something called ‘indoor skydiving’. This basically consists of floating above a huge fan, making it seem as if you are free falling. An indoor skydive centre just opened in Roozendaal, The Netherlands.
Fcuking nonsense. Where is the intrinsic fear? Where are the 7 bathroom visits during the 30 minutes before the plane takes off? Where is the unbearable tension as the plane slowly ascends to 3000m? Where is the total physical and mental state of panic as you slowly shift towards that hole in the plane? Where are the 200kph as you do a 30 second free fall? Where is that feeling of being cut in half as the chute opens? Where is the ‘flabbergastedness’ as you put your feet back on the ground? Where are those three days it takes for the adrenaline to leave your body?
I can know, as I have done the real thing. No, people, jerking off is not the same as having sex.
Where is the intrinsic fear?
Well, if they took away the grate that covers the fan blades, or if there were a malfunction.
“Lala. This is fun and I don’t have to risk jumping out of a pla OH MY GOD I’M GOING TI HIT THE BL *SPLAT*”
That solved everyone’s problems.
Comment by mikesum32 — December 27, 2006 @ 1:25 am
I really think I hate you.
Comment by Alex Forster — December 27, 2006 @ 4:17 am
I don’t care, Alex. It’s not like you really are somebody. Neither am I, so that’s one thing we have in common.
Comment by Thom Holwerda — December 27, 2006 @ 5:51 pm
Maybe he hates me.
Comment by mikesum32 — December 27, 2006 @ 11:00 pm
That would be priceless.
My comment still applies though.
Comment by Administrator — December 27, 2006 @ 11:32 pm
I would call you a jerk off for posting this, but that would lead us to a weird recursion in this case.
Comment by Hugo — December 29, 2006 @ 12:08 pm
Eh, just puttin’ it out there. I considered writing some long post explaining why you bother me so much, but then I thought “hey, maybe no one actually cares about my little whiny complaints!”
Take a lesson.
Comment by Alex Forster — December 29, 2006 @ 3:46 pm
As an (ex-) experienced skydiver, I can tell you that you’re wrong about indoor vs outdoor freefall.
The fear/adrelanine rush you’re speaking about is just for beginners then what really hooks you is the freefall sensation which is great and being able to do freefall with your friends.
Mastering deplacement in freefall is quite hard, so indoor freefalling is a good way to improve.
Plus not having your back broken at the opening of the parachute is a bonus not a minus: my brother had a back pain for a week after doing a tandem and my sister had a pain in her neck for a few days after doing a tandem also.. Strangely, they’re not so hot about jumping again, but they had great fun doing ‘indoor freefall’.
Comment by renoX — January 11, 2007 @ 3:18 pm