Cogs can think.

Shirley Manson, frontwoman of one of my favourite bands (Garbage), has released the first demo of her solo project. You can find it here, titled “In The Snow”.

I’m blown away. A very distinctive sound, but obviously with Manson’s instantly recognisable voice. I love it.

Sadly, her record company, Geffen, has turned down her demoes because they considered it “too noir”. Well, boo-fcuking-hoo, what else did they expect? Have they even listened to Shirley’s work with Garbage and Angelfish? Shirley’s lyrics are always very moody, dark, and depressing. That’s her style, it’s why people like me like her lyrics. They are always complicated, full of layers and deeper meanings. It’s not one-two-pop nonsense, it has never been.

Manson had this to say about it:

I had taken some of my solo music into the record label. They didn’t really care for the direction I was moving in and I found it really disheartening. They wanted a pop hit, which I understand in terms of making money. I get that. But what they were going to ask of me was something I wasn’t prepared to deliver and I felt kind of trapped. I just stopped writing. I just stopped. It was stifling.

Manson and Geffen then decided to part ways, and she’s now working without a record deal. This story bears remarkable resemblance to the Fiona Apple saga with Sony, where Sony also turned down her work because it wasn’t marketable.

This is exactly why I want the big media companies to just fcuk off and die. I don’t care about pricing or other restrictive policies they might enforce - I care about the art, and these media companies are hindering the production of art because they let themselves be guided by dollar signs. For all I care, the media companies charge 40 EUR for each album, I’ll still buy it - as long as they stop hindering the production of art.

Before it gets taken down by the record company nazis, here’s part one of Fiona Apple’s 1997 MTV Unplugged performance. Even I didn’t know this existed, so apart form the fact that I have to do penance now, I’m enjoying it just as much as everyone else. Part II isn’t yet uploaded, it seems, so let’s hope the uploader gets it up there as well. Never knew this had been recorded.

By the way, looking at old footage of Fiona just makes it all the more clear how much healthier she looks these days. God am I happy for that fact.

While we’re at it, here’s a fan interview with Fiona, which shows off so well how humble and kind she really is. There’s no media training here, no fake answers, no pleasing - it’s just who she is. She might come across as unnatural to people who aven’t been initiated into this whole Fiona thing, but that’s just because she is normal - everybody else in the music business has been media trained to death, void of any emotion or realness during their interviews. Fiona isn’t awkward - she’s just not trained to handle the media, making her all the more real and honest.

Too bad I won’t be able to interview her. I’ve got so much to ask her.

As has probably not gone unnoticed, I’m a bit of a Fiona Apple fan. In fact, I’m one of those Fiona Apple idiots, one of those people that belong to her core fan group, a group of people so obsessed with her work, her character, her being, that it sometimes scares me a little.

Listening to her art is still one of the most pleasurable past times for me. Listening to and watching interviews with her is one of the most entertaining things there is, because she isn’t media trained, and as such, comes across natural, unedited. Watching her perform is simply mindblowing - she’s not singing her songs, she’s engulfing herself in them, she’s reliving the tales told in the words, right there on stage, and you can taste it.

One of the controversial discussions among Fiona fans is which version of Extraordinary Machine is better - the leaked, unfinished Jon Brion version, or the actually released, finalised Elizondo record. Most of the people in the scary obsessed group of fans swear by the leaked Brion version.

I don’t.

A confession: I’ve never even heard it. Badum-tish.

The reason is simple. Fiona has made it clear that she wasn’t happy with the Brion version. It was too much Brion, and too little Fiona. Brion is an amazing producer, an amazing musician, and he did a great and outstanding job on Fiona’s When The Pawn, but for some reason, Fiona didn’t like the results when it came to Extraordinary Machine. She cancelled the project, and later on decided to start over, this time with producer Mike Elizondo.

This became the released version of Extraordinary Machine, the version that I proudly have in the prime position in my record collection as the limited-edition dual-disc version, which contains a DVD side with emotional and very cosy live material recorded at Club Largo.

Anyway, I have 100% confidence in Fiona. She knows what’s best for me, as one of her most devout fans and admirers. She said she didn’t like the Brion version, and recorded a new and apparently very different version of the album that she did like. And that’s enough reason for me to ignore the illegal bootleg release. I’ve never heard it, and I’m not going to either.

And I think it’s this blind faith in Fiona that makes the biggest and most devout Fiona fan in the world.

This live performance right here? Fiona Apple and Elvis Costello performing “I Want You”? This is the pinnacle of music - no, this is the pinnacle of art.

Seven minutes and eighteen seconds of pure emotion, frustration, and devotion. I am really not kidding when I say that Fiona is the best artist in human history. Whenever I see this performance, I’m just completely stunned, left breathless. You can see that the crowd knows they’ve witnessed something miraculous, you can see it in their eyes.

I would give up a lot for the opportunity to see Fiona perform live. I can live without my lungs, right?

While a lot of people seem to think that Fiona and Alanis are two apples fallen from the same tree, this is decidedly not the case. The two are like night and day, producing art with the only shared characteristic that of being music. Musically, the difference is pretty drop-dead obvious.

Lyrically, the difference might be a lot less obvious to casual listeners. I knew the difference was there, I knew they write lyrics that are really unique and not at all alike - I just never knew how to put it into words.

Well, I do now.

Alanis puts into words how everyone feels. Fiona puts into words how Fiona feels.

And, well, uhm, Fiona doesn’t really resemble ‘everyone’. You can easily identify with Alanis’ words, but you can never really identify with Fiona’s words. And that’s the major difference, and also the reason why lyrically, I prefer Fiona: she goes her own way, and she writes about how she feels, in her own unique way. Alanis writes about her own feelings too, but she writes in such a way that her listeners can identify with her - and she makes concessions in the process.

Fiona doesn’t do concessions. Fiona is all Fiona, all the time. And that’s why I love her so much.

It seems I have seriously changed my preference in women. And then I mean the looks department, as the character department is still the same.

I used to be a total long dark hair person, and eyes didn’t really matter to me. However, these days, I’m totally into lighter hair colours, preferably natural blonde, with bright, blue eyes. Blue eyes are enchanting. Green eyes are okay too - my Fiona has them, and one of my ex-girlfriends had them too. Green eyes are mysterious. My eyes are darkblueishgrey, by the way.

My last, err, object of affection had brown eyes. Maybe that was why it went so horribly, horribly wrong.

I SURE FCUKING HOPE SO.

There are five albums I’m currently waiting for. These five albums will more or less define my music habits for 2008 and 2009.

First and foremost, a new album by my idol, my girl knight in shining armour, my future wife, my everything: Fiona Apple. I need not introduce you to my admiration downright obsession with Fiona, and I also need not detail (again) why she is, by far, the greatest singer/songwriter that has ever walked this earth. Just go to the little search field in my sidebar, and do a query on her name.

Anyway, she said in the first half of 2007 that by fall 2007, she’d dive into the studio to work on her fourth album. Her third album, “Extraordinary Machine”, was released on 4 October 2005 (after an excruciating seven-year wait) to basically unanimously raving reviews, but it did mean the end of an era; “Tidal”, “When The Pawn…”, and “Extraordinary Machine” together form a trilogy. On “Tidal”, Fiona portrays herself mostly as sullen, slightly sad, and sometimes even as the victim. On “When The Pawn…”, she’s more of an agressor instead of a victim; she details the damage she ((un)willingly?) inflicts upon others, and she comes across as more assertive, ready to pick up a fight. On “Extraordinary Machine”, however, we hear a Fiona who has come to terms with her past, who accepts herself for what she is - we finally hear a Fiona who is content, even happy. The final line on the album closener “Waltz” says it all: “Everyone else’s goal’s to get big headed / why should I follow that beat being that I’m / better than fine.”

So, now that the trilogy is complete, what’s next for my beloved Fiona? Time will tell, but I hope Time won’t take its sweet time like it did between 1998 and 2005.

The second album I’m waiting for is The Cardigans’ 7th studio album. Studio time is planned for late 2008/early 2009, and knowing The Cardigans, who pride themselves on never having made the same album twice, we’ll be surprised and baffled by what they’ll come up with this time. I hope for at least a little dash of “Gran Turismo”, as I think that album’s dark and electronic sound had much more in it than just “Gran Turismo” - which is not to say it could’ve been better, I’m just saying the sound hasn’t been explored to its fullest of potential.

I’m also waiting for a new Garbage album. “Bleed Like Me” left me with a bitter aftertaste, as the album was a clear response to criticism the band received after “Beautifulgarbage”, a highly experimental, difficult-to-listen-to-at-first masterpiece. And you really shouldn’t listen to music critics. Because they are idiots. “Beautifulgarbage” was highly stylised, and mostly lacked the powerful guitar riffs from their highly successful and critically acclaimed first two albums. So, for “Bleed Like Me”, Garbage tried to sound more ‘grunge’, more raw, and it just didn’t work very well. Garbage is a band consisting of four producers (Butch Vig being one of them) so they should stick to what they do best: studio albums. Turn and twist those knobs, Shirley, Butch, Steve, and Duke, I know you like it.

Speaking of Shirley, she’s recording her solo album, and I’m obviously awaiting that one too. The album will be “quite dark and moody”, and that’s just how I like Shirley Manson.

This leaves me with number five on this list, and that’s the second A Camp album. A Camp is the solo project of Nina Persson, vocalist of The Cardigans. A Camp’s first album, imaginatively called “A Camp”, caught me completely off-guard, and even though it was not love at first sight, a few listens later, I embraced it for what it was: a slightly experimental journey into the unknown, Nina breaking free form the shackles of being in a band. It’s a great album, although I’m sure its country influence won’t be to everyone’s liking.

The coming two years are going to rock. Well, musically at least.

Is there anything more pleasing than watching a 20 month old tomcat chasing its own tail in the kitchen, lit by deep-blue LED lighting, with Alanis’ “Surrendering” playing in the background?

Well, apart from meeting Fiona Apple, I’m pretty sure the answer is ‘no’.

To me, TV commercials are a form of art. Good, well-thought out television commercials are a joy to watch. Sony, with their paint, bouncing balls, and claymation commercials for their flat-screen TVs, is at the top of the game when it comes to this art form, if you ask me.

There is one other brand that always knows how to tickle my fancy. Audi. Their new campaign for their R8 is just… Stunningly good. The combination of the music with the almost soothing imagery… I love it. It’s not an easy commercial to grasp though, you do need to know a thing or two about the R8 before you ‘get it’ (hint: the supercar is built by hand).

The music is The Beep Beep Song by Simone White - I love the song. It’s so pure, so sterile, and her voice… Dear lord, what a talent. If Fiona Apple and Sufjan Stevens had a baby daughter (of course, this is never going to happen, since Fiona will be marrying me, naturally), she wouldn’t be too far off from Simone White. Check her MySpace page for some more songs off her latest album. Anyway, here is the video for The Beep Beep Song.

Dear lord. It’s barely 2008! Which reminds me, happy new year everyone.

OSNews is down, and our ‘down’ page links to the staff blogs, including mine.

Hi.

This seems like as good a time as ever to state that I will remain working for OSNews for at least the coming two years. Barring any unforseen events, you know, like, Fiona Apple asking me to marry her and run off to a far away place to live happily ever after (hint, hint), I will continue my work as the Primary Newsbot of Newsmatrix 01 for at least two years.

So there. You’re kinda stuck with me.